Not as simple as it seems
by sexygeekgirlmojo
Summary: Clary is a normal girl with a normal life...until the incident. The incident shakes her whole life up and she creates the list. The list of things she's going to do before her time runs out. Will everything go as cliche as planned or will some certain people stand in her way?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Weird, strange, odd, shy.

That's just a short list of the names that people call me.

Granted there are a lot worse names that are on the full version, but I prefer not to think about those.

I prefer the words 'unique individual' or 'quirky' or 'different', but I guess not everything I prefer is what everyone else prefers.

My name is Clary.

There's nothing special about me. I'm annoyingly short with ginger hair and freckles that look like someone just attacked me with a brown pen.

I love to swim and draw and play music. But I'm really not exceptional at any of them.

I have the best friend in the world. Thing is he's my only friend but I've never seemed to need anyone else. His name is Simon.

He's the usual Star Wars geek who's also got a real passion for music.

Another thing is that everyone likes him. He could sit down anywhere in the canteen and be welcome with a fist bump or some weird Star Treck 'Spock' thing.

But we go way back. Like waaaay back. We are basically siblings.

Everyone thinks we are a 'thing' but we've talked about it and he says he'd rather sleep with Jaba the Hut than go out with me, which is fine because when you've seen a guy piss on your dogs head I don't think you would ever consider a romantic relationship with said guy.

I live with my mom in a quirky apartment in Brooklyn.

Yep, no dad. He died when I was little.

I still remember him though. Sometimes I get flashbacks of him singing to me and playing the guitar.

Everyone loved him, I guess everyone still does. Out of everyone, I think mum loved him most, that's if you don't count Luke.

He was Dads best friend, basically his brother. Sort of like me and Simon.

Luke's always been my dad to me though, which I suppose is good because he and mum have recently admitted to each other that they love each other.

If we were a normal family, then I would say that dating your dead husband's best friend is off limits, but we are not an ordinary family and everyone already knew anyway, even me.

Even random people on the streets stopped me and asked me did they finally tell each other.

Turns out mum and Luke are quite the celebrity couple.

If it makes them both happy then it's fine with me. I suppose it makes me happy as well, Luke's the only father I've ever known so now I guess he's going to be my 'official' dad.

I go to a normal high school in with normal kids with barely anyone above average intelligence or performance, except of course The Lightwoods.

Super hot, super smart, super popular and above all, super stuck up.

Alec Lightwood (the oldest) constantly looks like someone put shit in his sandwich and Isabelle Lightwood is your stereotypical Regina George with her killer heels and killer looks.

Then there's their adoptive brother Jace.

While the other two are dark and brooding, Jace is... golden. Literally. Like scientists say it's not possible that someone can have golden hair or golden eyes, but Jace Lightwood is all about going against rules and regulations.

There's surely not a day that goes by that doesn't have him fin detention for some rule that he's broken.

Personally, I think that he has a copy of the school's rule book just to see what stupid rules there are to break.

Apart from being the heartthrob of the school, he is an absolute and complete and utter dickhead.

I'm not usually one to feel harshly towards someone but this guy really deserves it.

I can stand his two other siblings but he is just an insult to mankind.

He once got everyone in school to call me carrot, and when I say everyone, I mean EVERYONE.

The guy has friends everywhere. So I had to stick with 'carrot' for an entire term, but everyone soon got tired of it.

Who wants to annoy someone who's too shy even to react?

Apart from being a social disaster, nothing much happens in school.

I do as much work as I can to pass the time until the bell rings that signals the end of every kid's torture.

Basically I have a normal life with a normal (ish) family and normal 16 year old girl in high school problems.

Well, that was story until 'the incident'. I don't like to talk about it much.

Everyone knows about it, but they don't 'know' about it. Like how it affects me and my family.

They don't know the nightmares that haunt me. They don't know how my mum cries into Luke's shoulder.

They don't know that I know that they know.

They don't know that I can hear them talking about it and they don't know that I notice how everyone treats me like glass. Like I'll shatter at one touch.

They don't know me.

They don't know how strong you have to be to survive and not break down. To keep living. Everyone pities me. I can see it now their eyes.

They tell me that they are sorry. I tell them not to be sorry.

It wasn't their fault. It has nothing to do with them.

I tell them that we are all going to die some day and that I'm just going to die a little sooner. Since people found out, they take me look at me like I'm not really there. Like I'm a ghost.

I feel like saying, "I'm not dead yet. You can mourn me when I'm gone but I'm still here."

Thats why I spend my time with Simon in places far away from home as I can.

Somewhere nobody knows me and somewhere that I can just be a normal girl who goes out and gets drunk with her friends.

But I can't do that. I'm too 'fragile', too 'delicate'.

Sometimes I wonder if it's even my life anymore. Sometimes it's like everyone thinks your already dead and you're just there, ruments floating between life and death. Not really belonging anywhere.

So I made a list. I made a list of all the things that I'm going to to before I die. To be honest it is a crazy list.

There were a couple of arguments with mum but I told her did she want me to spend the rest of my life lying in a bed. Growing paler and skinnier?

I told her that if this is all the time I have left to see and do everything, then I better get started because life is too short. Especially mine.

 **Authors note**

 **Hi guys, if it wasn't obvious I don't own Then Mortal Instruments or any other series by Cassandra Clare.**

 **This is my first mainly Clace fanfic! Please comment and tell me how I'm doing.**

 **Oh and I need ideas for 'The List'. Tell me if you were going to die tomorrow and you could only do one thing today what would you do? It can be literally anything. Honestly, the crazier the better!**

 **I will try and update as often as possible.**

 **Over and out**

 **(OMG I'm so cringy)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Clary! Hurry up!"

I would know that scream anywhere, I think anyone would.

It is the scream of stressed parent trying to get you out of bed in the morning.

I don't understand why school needs to start so early. It's obvious that everyone hates getting up this early, even the teachers. It just adds to the stresses of life.

I groaned and I pulled the covers back over my head as if the world would forget about me if I hid away, but sadly that's not how it goes.

"Clary!" It was mum again."Clary, Simon leaves in 20 minutes!"

"Shit!" Well, if that doesn't get you up then I don't think anything will.

I scrambled out of bed, only to feel a wave of dizziness wash over me. "Oops, forgot." Ever since 'The Incident', I would get sudden brain thingies. I know, thingies could be anything. I just can't remember the word. When the doctors are talking about it, I try to pretend that I'm somewhere else, so I don't really hear what they are saying.

" Shit, shit shit." I don't know about you but having twenty minutes to get ready when you are a teenage girl is not possible. There is a long list of what must be done.

It's not like guys who can throw on anything and not give a shit, unless you are Magnus Bane of course. Girls' outfits must be up to date with the latest fashion trends and must go with your hair and eyes.

When I first went to High School, I thought it was just don't wear anything that's dirty, but no. If you wear one thing that's wrong, you get called the 'Fashion Disaster' for at least three months and no one will have a decent conversation with you without bringing up that one time you slipped up. It's unfair and fucked up but hey, that's society acceptance for you.

The one thing I'm glad about is that I don't have to wear makeup. Thankfully, I literally have no pores or spots so puberty was a breeze for me. It also saves me an extra hour in the bathroom that some spend trying to put their makeup on at the perfect on a morning like this is a good thing because the words 'makeup' and 'five minutes' do not exist in the same sentence.

I literally jumped into my closet to find a decent outfit which was quite an achievement because my wardrobe is literally a jungle. I grabbed the closest thing to me. A green lacey top, a pair of black ripped jeans and a black leather jacket. Let's put one thing straight. I am not Emo, I just like black and it goes with everything.

I threw on my outfit and brushed my bush of ginger hair and pulled two strands of it back behind my face. I picked up my rucksack and my swim bag and ran downstairs.

When I stumbled into the kitchen Simon was sitting there practically flirting with my mum. I rolled my eyes. "Hey Fray, what took you so long?"

Mum then turned around and mock slapped me." Sleeping Beauty didn't arise from her slumber until ten minutes ago!"

Simon tutted and shook his head in mock disappointment.

" Shame on you Mrs Fray. I get up an hour early to come and drive your sorry ass to school and this his how you repay me?"

" Simon," I giggled, " you live five houses down the street, I hardly think you need a whole hour to come and get me."

" You would understand if you had my van. I have to turn the key for forty five minutes just to get it started!"

" Well you wouldn't have that problem if you had bought the car your mum suggested instead of getting the 'Real Vintage' van that breaks down every half mile and sounds like mum when she has a cough. And you know how bad that is. No offence mum."

I looked at mum apologetically but she just rolled her eyes and shoved us out the door.

" See you later guys, love you!"

" A real mum wouldn't shove her daughter and her best friend out of the house."

Mum winked at me through the letterbox and said, " Tough luck! I'm the only one you've got! Bye Pumpkin!"

I groaned at the use of one of my least favourite nicknames. I heard Simon snicker behind me and I punched him hard on the shoulder. " Ow!"

" You're pathetic, you know that?"

Simon clutched his heart in mock hurt. "Excuse me, I'm not the one nicknamed 'Pumpkin'."

"Oh I'm sorry, at least I didn't name myself 'Flabba the Butt'."

Simon grimaced. " Not one of my best moments."

"I wasn't aware that you had any best moments."

Simon slow clapped. "Solid burn Fray. I may need some Aloe Vera because that hurt."

I bowed and looked at my phone. "Shit! We are five minutes late for Professor Hodge's class!"

Simon paled and scrambled into his van and for good reason. That guy could make any constipated person shit his pants. Simon shoved the keys into the car and turned the keys desperately. " No, no no no. This can't be happening!"

I gulped. "Ok we have good news and bad news."

I breathed in slowly and said," Give me the bad news first."

Simon closed his eyes and said,"Erm, we are going to have to sprint to school which is at least several blocks away."

"And the good news?"

Simon hesitated then suddenly perked up. " There's pizza for lunch today!"

" Well that's great." My voice was thick with sarcasm." Problem is, if we are even more late for Mr Hodge's class then we already are, there won't be any pizza for lunch. There will be one thing...detention."

Simon and I looked at each other and simultaneously jumped out of the car, slammed the doors shut and took off at a sprint.

We ran the whole way down Brooklyn and all I could hear was the pounding of my heart and the frustrated cries of some old lady that Simon ran into.

"Clary," Simon panted, " I can't keep going."

" I thought you said that you ran!"

" I can run! Just not for more then twenty seconds!"

I groaned and looked around me. Blast you Simon! Why couldn't you be obsessed about your fitness like every other guy in high school?

I looked around desperately for something, anything. My eyes landed on a shopping trolley that was parked up by the side of a building. I didn't need to think twice.

I rushed up and grabbed it, ignoring the protests of the angry shopper. I signalled to Simon to get in. He gave me a look that said, No fucking return, I shoved him into the trolley and started off down the street.

" Clary, if anyone else sees me I will never be able to show my face in public again."

I snorted. " As if. Remember there was that disco at the club that was 'dress up', but no one was going dressed up but you did anyway. As fucking Chewbaca! "

Simon turned around as if to slap me but he was thrown off balance as I dodged one of those dogs that look like a rat on a lead.

Finally, we turned the last corner and I could see the school. "Almost there," I panted. But suddenly I felt an agonising pain in my chest.

Oh no, I thought, not now. It felt like someone had grabbed my heart and twisted it until the top of my heart was in line with my gut. The last time I felt this was that night. The night of ' The Incident'.

I remember that I was up late reading and I had just finished the book that I was on. The ending was so sad that I ended up crying because nearly everyone died.

Then I felt it.A pain that was so great that it was as if my heart was being ripped out of my chest. Then I started to scream.

Screaming felt like it was the only way I could relieve myself of the pain. I screamed until Mum and Luke came rushing in. I screamed the whole way to the hospital and I screamed when the doctors tried to touch me.

In the end they had to sedate me. I'm glad they did. I thought that I was dying and I was afraid.

I let go of the trolley and it and Simon went crashing into a wall. The world started to slow down, like people say it does when you are in a fight.

I slowly crumpled to the ground. I tried to put my hands out to soften the fall but I was too slow.

I hit the ground hard, jarring my shoulder. I rolled onto my back and I lay there writhing in agony.

I looked up at the pale blue sky trying to take in every bit of it. I didn't want my pain to be the last thing I experienced so I drank in every detail.

The swirl of the clouds, the tiny shade differences and the birds that flew effortlessly across my vision.

Suddenly the pain stopped, as if it had never started. I lay there dazed until I felt someone shaking my shoulder.

Simon.

" Clary, God, Clary. Are you ok, say something!"

"I'm ok Simon." My voice sounded cracked and raspy in my throat.

" You fell and you started to have some sort of fit and-"

" I'm ok Simon, really."

Simon fell back onto his ankles and breathed a sigh of relief as I sat up. " Do you want me to call your Mum?"

I thought for a moment. " No. I don't want to worry her and I'm fine now."

"Are you sure? Because what would worry her most is not knowing."

"Yes, I'm sure. There's nothing anyone can do to help me so I might as well get on with it.

"I'll help you. You don't have to go through this alone." Simon looked at me worriedly as if waiting for a response.

"I know."

Simon smiled at me. He's one of the only people who actually let me decide for myself.

Simon checked his watch and sighed. " Hope you aren't hungry because it's going to be lunchtime detention for us."

I groaned and Simon helped me back onto my feet and together we walked towards the school gates and up the steps that led to the front door. Simon gave me an encouraging smile and we walked side by side into the building.

 **Disclaimer:**

 **Obviously, I don't own The Mortal Instruments series or any other series by Cassandra Clare.**

 **I'm sorry I have updated. I was on holiday in Scotland and there I no Wifi In the Highlands. This has been my first chance to post since I got back. I promise to update more regularly.**

 **Thanks to everyone who suggested ideas for the list. The full contents of the List will be coming up in the next few chapters.**

 **Now random question. Does anyone here love LA Devotee?**

 **If not, tell me your favourite song and ill maybe listen to it and include it in one of the chapters.**

 **Over and out.**


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